I was born in Bielsko-Biała, but when
I was 5 years old, together with my parents and brother I moved
to the countryside. From those days I remember my neighbour's
house, her six children (half-orphans) and my Polish teacher in
High School. And of course my friends from High School, who helped
protect me during that time, as others thought I was different.
In fact, I lived a life of a village outcast.
The amount of experiences and feelings related to that special status was
overwhelming. In an emotional sphere, it made me completely vulnerable.
I started doubting the return of good for evil, though I still live according
to that principle.
I was different and that dissimilarity was exotic,
it was my passport for the first camp-fire with my fellow students. When
I brought my guitar along, the passport was extended. I felt accepted, needed.
It seemed I was indispensable. I had friends that excused me and
I have dreamed about Cracow ever since. It was
obvious, there was no need to speak it. Before coming to Cracow, I graduated
the National University in Wierzchosławice as a dance instructor. I haven't
danced since that time.
I was a first year student at the Jagiellonian
University when I was invited to the cabaret. I won the Student Song Festival
and I joined the team without any tests. I admired and appreciated the generosity
of Piotr Skrzynecki, his intuition and trust in me. I remember
him saying that one day I would "sing myself", that the time would come for me to sing
about how I really feel. He convinced me that I just needed some time to
do it, but it's definitely worth waiting. I was so scared, so afraid of
everything - I did not understand. I didn't know what to expect, but I felt
He was right.
"The Lunatic" and "Waltz" were the two songs
I brought along with me to the cabaret. At first, I was screaming onstage
rather then singing. However, I trusted that one day I would be able to
sing. Zbigniew Preisner gave me some of his songs; "We Must Sow" ("Musimy
siać") and "Don't Lose Hope" ("Miejcie nadzieję"). It was a real challenge
for me to sing "Kisses" ("Pocałunki"), "Images" or Hemar's Christmas carol "It
Was Snowing All Night" ("Całą noc padał śnieg") - beautiful, but difficult
songs, because they were so lyrical!
When I gave birth to my son, I was
sure about what I felt before: I have to write, I need to write.
And so I wrote, but I shelved my poems and lyrics.
In the cabaret I have
lived a few steps above the earth. My songs are not poetry - they're
more like a confession. I felt I need to prove their credibility with my
own life. Otherwise no one would believe me. I was afraid of the disapproval,
especially when I had no protection any longer. But in the cabaret
I met wonderful people, wise and caring, kind- hearted. It was an honor
for me and a great privilege to be with them.
I sing about good and bad things that
may happen to a person, who thinks with his or her heart. Thanks
to the songs, I find people who think that way too. I had always
believed there were many of them. I didn't even dare to think
that so many.